2/27/2013

Pork on a Fork.

Top: Thrifted, $6 (I WENT THRIFTING & IT WORKED!)
Cardigan: Old Navy, $5
Skirt: Papaya, Old
Shoes: Payless, $25




Thank you guys so much for your incredible response to my post yesterday. It was nerve-wracking posting it, and I definitely thought twice before hitting "publish", because I really try to keep things light around here. But I got so many comments and e-mails letting me know that I wasn't alone. And don't get me wrong, I'm a confident lady for sure. But sometimes you just have those days where you forget that it's okay to not be perfect, and the desire to be something you're not creeps up. Anyway, I think you all really understood my heart on the issue, and all of your comments seriously made my day, so THANKS

And onto lighter, more hilarious matters.

In case I haven't mentioned it before, I'll have you know: I don't cook. Seriously. Every night is fend-for-yourself-night in my house. Like, if it can't be made in a microwave in under 3 minutes or can't be shredded and put into a salad, Matt & I don't eat it. I swear, we eat healthy! It's just a lot of fruit, steamed veggies, boiled chicken (yeah, I know, gross), microwavable rice, and preservative-free microwavable meals. Whatever. JUDGE ME!

So anyway. An agent at work has been bothering me lately about cooking for Matt. Apparently yesterday he got so fed up with this my refusal to cook he asked me what my husband likes to eat (which, of course, I said "meat", because he is a man after all). He then left work and came back with a 3lb pork roast butt cut thingy (I honestly just remember him saying 'butt' and I couldn't forget it), and some seasoning, and instructions on how to cook it. 

There were literally like, three directions. My result was supposed to be a super tender pork roast, tender enough to shred and be able to turn into shredded BBQ pork. But what I actually ended up with was this:


Pork on a Fork.

Let's just say, it was definitely not tender enough to shred. It may have been a bit bloody in the middle. And my husband may have needed a full minute to chew every bite. But he did so with a smile on his face, because that's what good husbands do. And what he knew he needed to do to ensure that I would one day attempt to cook again.

Meh. We'll see.

21 comments:

  1. I am so proud! I love the polka dot shirt you thrifted! The red, black, and white combo is so classic too. I cook occasionally and even when I don't like how it turns out, my fiance' always loves it and eats it with a huge smile on his face. We have good men.

    <3 danielle
    goodwillista.blogspot.com

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  2. WOMAN. DO YOU HAVE A CROCKPOT. If you don't, go now. I'll wait.

    *I assume your superhero powers can summon a kitchen apparatus to you in approximately this much time.*

    Okay now.
    One 2lb-ish pork butt/shoulder/cut/I'm not going to pretend to know what part of the pig. I guess and I get lucky.
    One can of Dr. Pepper. Or Coke. Or Root Beer. The important thing is, brown soda. You know how it does scary things to like rust on car stuff and that's why we're not supposed to drink it? Similar effect on dead pigs but less scary when you don't refer to dinner as "dead pigs."
    Barbecue sauce.

    Are you ready for this.
    Step one. Put the butt in the crockpot. I like to say butt now and it's your fault.
    Step two. Dump the evil soda all over it.
    Step three. Set the crockpot to low and the timer to 6 hours. I don't think this counts as cooking, don't be scared.
    Step four. Take it out, drain it, shred it, dump barbecue sauce on it. It's all very scientific.


    Oh yeah. There's more where this came from. Crockpots will save you. Actually make hubby buy it, he's about to benefit a lotttttt.

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    Replies
    1. Yes! This is what I do too (but I add a package of dry onion mix). It's the easiest thing ever and always gets rave reviews. And I even let mine cook on low for around 9 hours and it's fine.

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  3. I agree with ^^ about the crockpot. But my recipe is slightly different.

    Get peperoncini (I like the ones that are already pre-cut up so that you don't have to worry about picking out stems when you are eating) and a bottle/can of beer (avoid dark and fruity flavor).
    Put meat in pot, add peperoncini and beer.
    Let that all crock in the pot for a handful of hours.
    Over time, try to pull it apart as it gets softer. Two forks close together, then move them in separate directions. Easy, right? Then (oh yeah, buy hearty buns - I like Sara Lee sesame seed)
    Put meat on bun and eat. It's soooo good.

    Which brings me to my next (er first) point. I am the same as you, but worse. I hate the idea of spending more time making food than it takes to eat it. Seriously. Once I made an awesome sandwich, but after I ate it, I was mad that it took so long to make it (a few minutes, really). This past year my patience has grown and I am willing to let things heat on the stove (soup, chili) as long as I can leave it and do something else in the mean time.

    The difference between us is that my husband will cook, and he is good at it (although he doesn't want to every day). So the above recipe is his; it calls for some sort of huge chunk of beef, but I'm sure it works with pork, too. He has another awesome crock pot miracle with chicken breast, taco seasoning, peppers, and onions for shredded chicken tacos. Sooo good.

    Okay now I'm going to go pester him to make me something in the crock pot this weekend :)

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  4. Hey girl! Sorry I missed the post yesterday! I really appreciated your honesty and heartfelt words! I think we as women can all bond over this matter. We all have off days. We've all felt uncomfortable in our skin at some point in time. We all feel the desire to be perfect, look perfect, act perfect, etc. And no matter how hard we try....it isn't "good enough". I'm constantly comparing myself to others.....so and so is 6 feet tall, and so and so has this curvy gorgeous body, and so and so is smarter, prettier, more successful, outgoing, cooks better, is healthier, etc etc. We need to hush that critical little voice in our heads that tells us we are not good enough. You know what I'm sayin lol? End rant. You girl are amazing, smart, and beautiful just the way you are! And honey you can rock a pencil skirt like it's no one's business:)!

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  5. i can't cook either! dago definitely cooks, but his meals are very meat-based, which i don't eat a lot of. and i can sort of make pasta if you give me a pot, but he claims to be allergic to pasta (but not gluten?), so he won't eat it. we're moving in together in may and i foresee us both making separate meals most of the time. oh well.

    supa cute outfit, girlfran.
    xo nicole

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  6. you did everything right. he won't ask for pork [on a fork or otherwise] again. off the hook! :)

    jason's so happy when i cook ANYTHING. you might remember my mac-n-cheese heart framed with hot dogs for valentine's day? yup. wife of the year.

    -natalie-
    thesecondbestblog.com

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  7. Yeah for the thrifted top, and polka dots to boot! I hate cooling too. My husband is an awesome cook and my mother in law cooks for a living at an old folks home. We pretty much rotate pizza, spaghetti, meatloaf, grilled chicken, taco salad, grilled pork, repeat at my house. If it can't be made in 20 minutes I don't do it, and we all survive :)
    Ginny
    mynewfavoriteoutfit.blogspot.com

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  8. You crack me up- pork on a fork hahaha

    In other news, this outfit is adorable!

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  9. Very cute outfit! I must agree, you need a Crockpot asap! : )

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  10. HA! You need to start crock potting - that's totally my excuse for "cooking." Throw a bunch of stuff in, let it simmer all day, come home to a yummy-smelling house and voila! A home-cooked (hub-approved) meal!

    xo
    See Mo Go.

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  11. Oh my gosh- definitely sounds like something that would happen to me! I definitely plan on taking some basic cooking classes before I get married so I can make Matt something other than Easy Mac and PB&J sandwiches.

    Although, I'm pretty sure he'd prefer the mac 'n cheese and PB&J over a fancy pork dinner any day ;)

    OH and speaking of jelly...I am SO JEALOUS you found that white & black polka dotted top while thrifting! It's gorgeous.

    -Jenna Brianne
    wearablefunfashion.blogspot.com

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  12. I always look at your blog to get inspiration for what kind of clothing to pair together, and I loved today's outfit. I love thrifting. And I love the cardigan.

    And on top of all that, I literally cracked up when I saw the bottom photo.
    Better luck next time, I suppose. (:

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  13. I was so intrigued by the title of this post... Ha ha! Our cooking has improved the longer we have been married. But we do a lot of easy recipes. I love your outfit. So cute!

    Amy
    Fashion and Beauty Finds

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  14. Such a cute (and thrifty!) outfit!! I love this!! Plus, you are so beautiful!! Lovely blog, I'm your newest follower!! Looking forward to more posts from you!! <3
    xx Amanda,
    http://geekyfashionista.blogspot.com

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  15. hahahah too funny! Love your post today, the thrift find is pretty awesome! love the color. Nice attempt to cook, at least you tried right LOL

    XO Chelsea
    http://shesaidhesaid-fashion.blogspot.com/

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  16. way to thrift the heck out of that top, i love it on you!

    and i want to come over and cook you dinner now! but then again, i commend you for trying to cook something like that, i would have been scared off by trying to cook a large hunk of meat, haha.

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  17. Great post. Very happy to have stumbled upon your blog!
    x Kirsty

    http://geelongfashionista.wordpress.com

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  18. Hahahahahaha this just totally cracked me up! I also don't cook...ever. I hate it. And I'm the worst at it - I royally screw up pretty much every time, ha.

    On the flip side, I love your blouse. I can't believe you thrifted it! It's so cute, and looks like it was made for you!!!

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  19. Hi, new reader here! I meant to comment on your first post but I just kept reading and reading and reading but this post made me laugh so hard! (Pork on a fork! I pretty sure that's a fair food somewhere!)
    It is tricky roasting pork butt but if you want a really sure-fire, simple way to do pork, put the pork in a crock pot with water and seasonings and leave that sucker for the say. After 8-10 hours it will melt off the bone and you can either toss some potatoes and carrots in and have a great stew of pull the pork out, shred it, put your favorite bbg sauce on it and have the best pulled pork ever. It's really easy, takes almost not time and hey, men love pork. :)

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